I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Life without a bra equals bliss.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
