On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
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