I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
