I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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