I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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