you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
you would pick up someone in the library
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Congratulations! We have a period
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
