its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
