I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
