I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
