That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Randomize
