Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize
