Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
