that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
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