i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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