ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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