In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Randomize
