erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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