You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
