she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
