We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Randomize
