proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
