$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
