I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
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