My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Randomize
