i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Randomize
