i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
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