I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Randomize
