I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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