he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Randomize
