you would pick up someone in the library
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize