Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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