New low: just hacked my moms facebook
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
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