The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
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