Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
