His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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