Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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