we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
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