This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
