There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
cat food counts as protein by the way
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
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