News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
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