i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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