i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
Randomize
