No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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