there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
