Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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