I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Randomize
