sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
Randomize
