Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
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