he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Randomize
