Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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